Tonight in my Healer's Art Class we had a conversation about dealing with Grief and Loss. We talked about ways in which we liked how other people have responded to our personal losses in the past...and ways we didn't like very much.
When we deal with grief or a loss, a lot of people tend to intellectualize it, devalue the loss, be in denial or ignore the loss, we get angry, we blame people, we rationalize it, we spiritualize it.
A lot of times we try to be helpful when someone else experiences a loss by saying things like "it's going to be okay", or asking if there's anything we can do, or giving advice, or filling up air space by talking. But really, most people probably just want a show of compassion, a hug, and someone to really listen to them.
This class is a really nice change of pace from my other classes (Quick what are the symptoms associated with 45, x? Trisomy 21? What are the steps of fertilization? Which one is the ulnar nerve again?!), and helps me think about some of the issues I'll be dealing with regularly. As it was put tonight, this class is prophylaxis against the transition from the precynical years to the cynical years...I also love my small group, a lot.
Here is the quote we were presented with at the start of our session: "The real voyage of discovery lies not in seeking new vistas but in having new eyes" -Marcel Proust